A Train Ride and Memories...

This is my NANO (national novel writing month) so grammar is on the back burner more so then ever.  I am checking spelling but that does not mean I won't miss something... read if you want and enjoy if you can...

Journal Entry One A:

It is another train ride to Hogwarts. Always amazing. I never imagined rolling through the wall to the platform to be so exhilarating. The last few times have just given me a thrill. It is good to see all my friends as well. It is good to start to talk to them. But we are almost to the Hogwarts so I should get ready, get into my robes and get my wand ready.

Journal Entry One B:

The feast was grand, as always, the Headmaster and the Professors make me feel so welcomed. And my dorm mates have been so encouraging. It was also good to see the boys, James, Sirius, Peter and Remus. 

They were there for me last year, when I became cursed. I don't know how but I did. I know it was a quill. It had been laced with Dementor Essence and it brought me into a spiral. I wish I knew who put it in my school supplies. I wish I knew how to thank Remus for seeing me in that state. So down so drawn on. I barely completed classes. I was amazed I was asked back. I don't know if I would have asked me back.

The fight that I had, to rid myself of the curse was epic. Or so I was told. I don't remember much of it. I remember preparing for the fight.

The quill seemed to attach itself to me at all times. Sliding into pockets or in between parchment papers or in a journal, without me even realizing it was there. I knew, even if I thought I had left it in my room, it would follow me to the bathroom where, the boys and I were going to preform the anti-curse.

And sure enough it did come. I had dressed myself in a light bit of clothing, just a t-shirt and a pair of pants, my feet were bare, because I felt more secure if I needed to flee or get a grip on the ground. I did not feel that shoes or socks could help me with that. I had my hair up so that it wouldn't get in the way. When I arrived in the bathroom the boys were there. Remus had a cauldron going, a light glowing liquid bubbled in it. He had told me to put the quill in the cauldron. So I started to but my hand would not let go. I couldn't seem to drop the quill into the liquid. It always seemed to end up in my hand or pocket or behind my ear. It took an hour of them telling me that I had not done it yet. At one point Sirius even tried to take it out of my hands and put it in himself. I hit at him, not as though I could do much damage, and James stopped him from retaliating. Which was probably a good thing, because he could really really hurt me.

Finally I stood in front of it, holding the quill with both hands. I stopped and meditated for a few moments, focusing my energy, and let go. I watched almost in slow motion the quill fall downward into the liquid and the color go from a glowing yellow to tarry black.

And that was where my memory stops, except for what the boys told me, or rather Remus shared. Remus, told me of how the cauldron exploded and the black liquid bubbled outward and formed into a shadow of me, a shade almost. She spewed hate and despair from her mouth. Sirius had drawn his wand and stepped up to her telling her to back off. She turned and hissed a cloud of toxic smoke at him that he choked on, causing him to stagger backwards. James had stepped up next to Sirius and held him up as the attack happened. But he too was blinded by the smoke. Remus had managed to skirt behind her and was trying to contain the rear side so it would not spread farther than the bathroom itself.

Peter, bless his heart, had apparently placed himself between her and the window, the fading light of the day was filtering around him. He had fortunately noticed that the shade me, didn't want anything to do with the daylight, so he stayed firmly in the beam, but he also noted that it was fading fast.

Remus told me that I was still standing but was seemed to be a dark smoky chain was wrapped around me, holding me in place weighing me down. And it wasn't until she started to spew words of hate, towards them, of how they were less than nothing that I actually acted. He said that I seemed to shrug off the chains and yell at her, telling her that they were not was she said, that I was not what she said. I told her, “That I am a strong and creative witch and she holds no power over me and I will accomplish what I choose to do, even if I don't know what that choice is yet. I banish you back to the shadows, I banish you back to the darkness from which you came, I banish you from my heart mind and spirit. I am strong and you will never change that.”

With those words, apparently, I broke the curse that was on me. What Remus hadn't seen, was that the troupe, my ferrets, had some how come to me and were sitting all around me. I don't know how I did it but I did. The love that I felt from those little furry slinkies, my ferret troupe, saved me. They always save me. I am still not totally sure how I get away with having all of them. If it is because they belong with Hogwarts or if the Professors and Headmaster know that I take care of all of them as much as they take care of me, but I don't question it. At least not at this point in time. Not when it is my 7^th year.

The rest of the year Dumbles and Snapers stayed with me and I felt the boys close by even if I didn't see them.

Somehow, I think that I have become apart of their little band of merry men, trouble makers as they are.

But it is getting late and we have early classes tomorrow, so I should get some sleep. Maybe Remus is up and there is some hot chocolate to be found in the common room.